I realize that the last post is almost 3 months old when I welcomed 2013 ! 3 months have been gulped ! This new year is already starting to look old ! Lot of thoughts are in line and last three months have been hectic ..full of unique experiences and baffling realization of realities.
In the travel across continents and countries / civilizations / cultures one tends to lose ones focus , being enchanted by newer things .. sometimes just realizing what one truly likes .. freely exploring one self by exposing to varied cultures and thus sometimes finding ones true self by shear chance.
This phenomenon occurred to me over last 18 months or so ! Missing ones roots to finding ones real self ..ones true liking... and then missing something that one has simply given away for free ! sounds philosophical but this is quite mundane and earthly experience. Realizing what one truly desires is one heck of happiness in itself. Enough of this philosophical rhetoric ... getting to the point ..
I have not written anything in last three months though I had planned on writing a post every day in the new year resolution ! enough said .. last 90 days went without a blog post. To be fair .. I did not feel like writing anything simply because I was digesting lots of experiences .. getting blown away by collapsing traditional beliefs that had been harbored over years ! Finding myself again in new light with clear understanding of what I really want .. where I belong and where I want to stay ! This in itself has been a unique fulfilling experience. Meeting people from various fields ... challenging ones own limits and abilities ... accepting new challenges ... venturing into unexplored areas ... passionately following ones dreams ... enjoying smaller things in life ... doing things which I wanted to do all my life ! This has been a heck of trail ! In all these have been some learning experiences .. heartening and humbling experiences that makes me feel lucky and blessed .. simply because I am who I am .. and able to do what I really love !
One such incidence that touched me was when a long time ex-pat expressed his disillusionment first of the west and then of east after returning to homeland with very sincere intentions. His children, born in west, felt out of place here in India while he felt a sincere need to find his roots. The heartening fact (which even I felt in India) was that the roots that he was searching were more of a nostalgic emotional binding which did not require a complete move to the homeland.. a regular extended vacation per year would be suffice. The nostalgia that one feels after leaving ones homeland for an extended period of time is of transience .. a complete move to homeland is not warranted for such emotional needs ! These thoughts might be out of disappointment or disillusionment after experiencing the ground realities of political , social , cultural condition of changing India. I however have grown over that hump now !
An immigrant always has to tackle such kind of trade-off ! The real ache is when one finds oneself as an immigrant in ones own homeland. Most returning ex-pats have gone through such phases of disappointments and disillusionment .. so have I. These days have however taught me to be patient and assertive. A tinge of aggressiveness is essential for surviving in this vast population of India. One needs to be very selective too .. humble only to selective people ! These lessons can be learnt well from a small kitten as it grows up to be a beautiful and strong cat ! At least I have learnt these lessons from my dear pet cat !
Rounding it off to end this emotional , philosophical pondering for the first blog post of 2013 ...90 days late .. I am looking forward to enjoying my second summer in Pune with IPL / NBA playoffs and the gastronomical summer treats ! Till next blog post .. adios !
